A FINAL GOOD-BYE

My Aunt Elaine is in the hospital. We recently found out that her body is full of cancer...pancreas, liver, spine, neck...pretty much everywhere. She has pneumonia. She's dying. On Sunday she was told she has two to four weeks left to live. She's 62. She has five children and five grandchildren. My Uncle Ronny (nicknamed "Rooster") pass away suddenly thirteen years ago from a heart attack. One of Aunt Elaine's five grandchildren, Riley, passed away in January 2007 at the age of five months.

On Sunday afternoon, my mom, dad and I drove to the St. Cloud hospital to visit Elaine. My mom had gone to visit her at home a week earlier and said that Elaine had shaved her head due to hair loss caused by the chemotherapy. Since I knew this I was a little apprehensive about seeing her and not staring at her bald head. I was also a little nervous about the "mood" of the room and how to react to the news she had just received that morning. Needless to say, there was no need for concern regarding any of the above.

When we walked into Elaine's hospital room, she was sitting up in bed watching the Twins baseball game. When she saw us she got a big smile on her face. Yes, I did notice her bald head, but even before that I noticed her eyes. I couldn't stop looking directly into her eyes. They were beautiful! Her blue eyes absolutely glistened and sparkled. Her attitude was simply amazing. She told us that she knows she cannot continue to live this way. Although she was wheezing from the pneumonia, she still continued to visit and talk and laugh with us. Her kids had all left for a while to get something to eat and take a little break. My parents and I had her to ourselves for a while.

We hadn't been there long when the hospital priest came in to visit her. He was such a nice, comforting, peaceful man. He asked Elaine if she would like to be anointed and she said yes. He then asked my parents and I to help him. He told us to all put our hands on Elaine while he anointed her with oil and prayed over her. Then we all said together The Lord's Prayer. The peace that was on Elaine's face made her look absolutely beautiful!

When it came time to leave I knew this would be the last time I saw my Aunt Elaine. I wasn't quite sure what to do or say. My mom was first to say good-bye. Then my dad. No one cried. It was peaceful. Then it was my turn. Again, I just couldn't take my eyes off her eyes. We looked directly at each other and she told me she loved me. I told her I loved her, too. As I hugged her for the last time, I whispered in her ear the one thing that had been on my mind the whole time we were there..."I hope meeting Jesus is awesome." In our last exchange she smiled a big smile, nodded her head and said, "I hope so, too!"

My mom put it best when we were on the drive home. We all commented on her eyes. Her beautiful, sparkling, glistening blue eyes. That's when mom said, "It's almost as if she's already seeing heaven."

I've never said good-bye to someone knowing for sure it would be the last time I saw them. It's something I always thought would be fearful, uncomfortable, frightening. Aunt Elaine showed me something entirely different. Although very sad, it was also comforting and calm. It was peace.

Blessings.
J