Okay, blogging friends, I have a question. Ready?
Here's the situation:
New friend over to play. Friend does lots of tattling because, as Friend says,
"I'm the guest and the guest gets to decide what we play."
Friend is not the only friend who has done this.
This mommy said, "Well...I'm not going to continue to listen to this. You guys need to figure it out and you need to take turns doing what everyone wants to do. Otherwise, play date is over."
What are your thoughts?
Peace.
Jeanine
4 comments:
I think I would also gently remind the guest that it's also good to take turns having the idea. Maybe the guest can have the first idea and then Faith gets to choose the next activity. But otherwise, yes, I'd end the playdate or not have them as often if it continued to to be a problem. My only hesitation with that is that it seems like Faith gets "punished" too in a way. Is this someone who comes over often?
I like the reminder to take turns and I think you said the right thing.
While I do tell my kids that "guests go first" I think I'd also have a conversation with them after that guest left and acknowledge that the situation probably wasn't fun for them.
I know this was a new friend, which makes it a little more challenging, but if this was a frequent thing, I'd simply say something like, "You've gotten your turn before, so let's let so-and-so choose now."
Best wishes with this! :)
Hugs,
Genny
This is someone that Faith has been friends with for a while, but just recently started coming over on a regular basis. I, too, have told Faith that when a guest comes over we make them feel welcome and do things they want to do, but I also feel like the friend that is invited over also needs to be polite as well. I would be mortified if my children went to someone's house to play and said, "I'm the guest so we do only what I want to do." This one will be a work in progress and I'm trying to nix the tattling. I don't like tattling.
I've talked to Faith about it when we're alone and told her that I don't like the behavior that Friend is exhibiting...especially the tattling. I've told Faith that she should come to me with questions or when Friend is doing something that is against the rules...like climbing up the ladder-less side of the bed.
Boy play dates at this age were so much easier. Give them some Match Box cars or Legos and they were fine!
you are right
best,
sibylle
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